urhguhugrh

So im plagued with sickness and tooth ache, but life is good, because i dont have to go to university. So anyway i have the sorest throat and tooth ache as i said, i really need to go the dentist but im sooo mega lazy and in a way im a bit worried about what they are going to say. YOU NEED 10 FILLINGS, IT WILL BE 1000000000000000 DOLLARS. Yes the dentists are the biggest rip off damn you teeth, why cant teeth be made out of some indestructible material, then i would be able to eat anything, it would be awesome.

Not really related, but it made me giggle

Anyhoo other than that life is good my last assignment was due in yesterday so now im free. Free to sleep, eat, and just be a lazy nerd in general. The probably is, the good life has an expiry date, and that date is 2 weeks away, and when the good life expires, i am sent back into the hell which is know as midterm exams... OH JOY, but will i study?... maybe (no) and i should pass.

Oh so i actually dropped maths last week, so i go in to drop out, this course costs like $850 and there is no refund this late into the semester, but so far this calls sucks beyond belief and the organisation is like beyond terrible. The lecturer comes in 10 minutes late everyday, i then sleep through the remaining 40 minutes, the lecture slides are always clustered with spelling and grammatical errors, and every time he sees one he comes out with a story "mm i have been very busy just wrote these 1 hour ago didn't have time to proof read". He even admitted he had never used the tool that he is teaching us to use prior to this course. So we have an unorganized boring lecturer who doesn't know anything and he is trying to teach us some of the hardest and most retarded/useless stuff in the world. so that's why i and many other people have dropped the course... i hate maths.

Ok so im actually dying here of hunger, i went to the kitchen before and there is no instant food, i dont want to cook.. its 4am, i want instant food, i could eat some ice cream but i dont know. do i really want ice cream? i guess i do but the thing is ice cream isnt the best at 4am, its cold and its cold outside, it just is not ice cream weather. So my question is, what is 4am food? Maybe google will know.

This was almost related so i used it

I'm back and i think that was the worst idea in the world, i went to have a look and all it said was things like. Turkey sandwich, <insert delicious food  i don't have here>  but i have concluded ill eat some toast, and maybe some cereal too depending on what we have. Cereal is the awesomest food at all times of the day, true story.

So before i die of starvation im going to roll into the kitchen and make me some foooodddzzzz. tschüss :D

DONE

Ok so its all done, its probably got many bugs and is annoying in some ways but those things take a little while to fix and a bit of testing/playing around with that i cant really be bothered with, anyway i reckon its kinda cool :D now next challenge is trying to get it to work on the blog hmm

Ok finnallyyy got it to work. It shouldnt take too long to load, mine loaded pretty quick on my crappy internet

Moved it because it was causing this page problems, its on its own page now here -
http://moanly.blogspot.com/p/game.html

Game is pretty basic, just kill as many comets as you can, more will spawn every time you clear them, be careful when you spawn because sometimes there are asteroids flying straight at you like insta, might fix this when i can be bothered. also be careful when going through edge of the screen there could be an asteroid waiting for you on the other side :D that goes the same for hanging around the edge. Also especially with the big ones they sit off the edge of the screen for about half a second. and finally sometimes your bullets dont destroy asteroids, sorry in advance, just pretend its a extremely low chance to miss... its a ghost asteroid

UP TIME

i feel i write i a lot of depressing and seriousness stuff, so its time for a fun blog, thats right, a fun blog. I dont know if it will actually be fun but ill try make it fun, fun fun fun. Anyways ill start by saying, as lazy as i say i am, im honestly not that bad, I have good motivation when i dont hate something and i will finish things i know i should/have to finish.

OOOOOOK so lets start this party, so i got my cans of drink today from 1-day which is a website which has daily deals which are like uuuber cheap. anyway i get them and they are from another country or something right? and i open the thing... its the weirdest can i have seen in my life. They have a retardly shaped opening which you dont push you actually pull. Its like everything is reverse, its actually kinda annoying because when i want to down a quick drink i cant because the hole is a retarded shape and as soon as you start trying to drink too quickly your mouth just gets siphoned into it, other then that, it is kinda good that you cant break the pully thing off into the can, and it doesnt seem so damn sharp around the edges. STILL ITS NOT NORMAL AND WE DISCOURAGE ABNORMALITY RAWWRR. (i couldnt find one of those annoying cans and im not taking a picture so you can have a different can).

Other than that i actually bought bottled water like a few days ago, because i felt bad for drinking so much soda and all that, my mum tells me that its bad for me, and pretty much going to kill me (this is infered) she also says that about msg which is in like 80% of all preserved foods now. I dont mind it though MSG makes things taste better, but it does make you thirsty, hmph i dunno. Lets just say msg is bad and i dont care, die happy young iiimooooooo.

Anyway, finally while im on the subject of food, guacamole dip and chips, best thing ever.

OK so i have actually been looking at programming java web applets which are java flash games essentially, turns out they are mega easy to program, sooo you might see some awesomely addicting game up on my blog at some point in the future, when i can be bothered and have time really. I still have to finish programming cluedo which has turned into a fucking nightmare, aaahh problems problems, anyway all that put aside yes. Soon i will try get one up for awesomeness. Im not sure how i would do it but ill figure it out. IT WILL BEEE AWWESOOMMMEEE.

anyway im sneezing and shiz because its getting chilly yo, so i might just head out to a warmer location, being my bed. As it is 4am again, AGAIN.

bro, whats that

Life is what seems to be a very tough and long journey, what has meant to make life easier and better seems to just complicate things. Sometimes the things that make us 'better' than the wild animals make me wonder if they make us better at all. The simpleness of life as a wild animal somewhat appeals to me, to have one sole purpose which is to survive.

Now it feels like we live in a world where the small people stay small and the big people get bigger, where we are everyday pinned on having a degree or education or forever doomed to working at macdonalds, where some people have to work long and tiresome jobs to "survive" but surviving in these days just seems a lot more complicated and a lot more stressful than what that would be of a wild animals life.

That is why i wonder is life really better, sure people live longer and less people die, but is that even a good thing? who wants to live an extra 20 years once they are 60, from then on its just down hill, i would rather die in my sleep as a 60 year old than slowly become a cripple.

Now to be honest my motivation is slowly getting worse and worse for university, especially in classes i dont like, e.g. Discrete Mathematics/formal foundations of programming. The are beyond boring and beyond disorganised, i dont know how ill pass a paper i cant even stay awake for in class, and when im spending $800 on a course i expect the lecturer to come in on time not 10 minutes late every day and i also expect assignments to be out when they are said to be out, the course website to be out when the course starts. Really putting it down on paper shows how terrible it is.

Its to the point where i spend my time at home looking for things to do, where study is not even an option because i would rather stick my hands with knives than submit myself to that mental torture. I am all good for learning, and im good at it too, but i dont see why i have to sit down and read a book to do it, infact i generally dont see how sitting down and reading a book is going to help at all when in reality, when you go to get a job you ditch all the book bullshit you learnt and they teach you everything you need to know for the job anyway.

I was actually pondering what it would be like if you knew you would die soon, not having to worry about your future or anything beyond your death date, I guess most people would see if as a curse to find your expiry date soon but to me it i think it would bring some sense of peacefulness, nothing to really worry about and living as you please.Though i do somewhat live like that already, i do actually consider my future very often and very seriously.

While its good to ignore your worries and just do whatever makes you feel good at the time, its also very important to know you arent going to condemn yourself to a hell on earth. Its always important to think of all possibilities quickly and know what you can do if everything goes bad. That way when something does go bad you are already a bit ahead on knowing what to do, it not only helps in that regard, but it keeps the anxiety away which further helps you in knowing what to do.

It has happened that i havent thought through what i would do if things went bad a few times and when things did go bad i almost put myself in a spot where i would have screwed myself over for all of eternity, luckily things have seemed to work themselves out and im now in what would seem to be a good spot, though it doesnt feel like it. Plagued by boredom and university work that i am really not enjoying at the moment, i wonder if it is a good spot. My only hope is to try and power through it the best i can hoping to find a job that i will maybe enjoy. Regardless thinking of ways out of bad situations is always a good thing to do.

I havent wrote in a while so it seems i am writing forever, but i guess ill keep going until i have nothing more to say, i was actually meant to be asleep 1 hour ago as i have to get up for university real early because i live over a 1 hour train ride away and i have a 9am lecture, that is another reason why i miss so much university, 9am starts with no potential gain beyond maybe getting an A- instead of a B. Really those grades all seem the same to me, C,B,A at the end of they day if you have a charming personality you will be better than someone who gets straight A+.

Fortunately i have found i normally have a charming personality, and its something i have really learnt over a long period of time and its all really just being flexible, being able to be a different person with different people, being the person that they like not who you want to be because if someone likes you better then it will be a lot easier for you. The best way to tell this is with body language and reactions i have found, treading carefully at first until you get comfortable with what they want and expect and they get more comfortable around you, then you can afford some higher risk-higher gain things and afford to step out of their lines a bit. its something i have found very useful, I guess it all comes down to being manipulative which as immoral as it is, it is a good skill to have and to use.

I think i am finally out of things to say and should really go to sleep so i will ditch now...

Superstitions

Superstitions in my opinion are all psychological, that and because of the nature of your beliefs, most the time people dont dare to explore possibilities therefore making it instantly supernatural. Closed mindedness is probably one of the worst things to have, and its important to weigh the evidence before making a final conclusion, which is what seems a lot of people lack, and yet its such an important skill to moving forward in life.

Furthermore the brain is a truely mysterious and convincing thing, it will make you believe and see anything you want it too, and it is important to know how to make sure you brain is acting logically and always thinking logically. Almost always the logical solution is the best solution except in moral situations where sometimes morality is important also, but normally, i believe that logical answers are better than moral answers.

Anyway, i feel a story coming on. There was a man and another man, for stories sake lets say, John and Movi (dont ask). Annyywaayy, Movi was over at johns house when he saw the lamp shade shaking, he instantly assumed it was a ghost and made the conclusion that there was a ghost in the house, John disagreed as he knew it was just the hot air currents from the heater bellow, Movi instantly accused him of being closed minded because he was not willing to accept that it was actually a ghost. But actually it was Movi who was the closed minded one because he was not willing to explore further possibilities and jumped to an unreasonable conclusion. (this story was completely stolen... i confess. i just like it). SOO to make it clearer, seek evidence nomnomnom.

NOM OUT :D